Back in 1981 while I was baking in the oven, Jimmy Buffett put out an album called the Coconut Telegraph. It was on this album that the song "Growing Older but Not Up" was introduced to the world. I grew up with Buffett constantly playing on our turntable or through cassette tapes in the family van, so I was subliminally made into a Parrothead. And while I was likely the only kid in my neighborhood who could belt out any of Buffett's songs (minus the swear words, because that was a no-no when I was a kid), it wasn't until this particular song streamed from my Spotify account a couple of weeks ago that I really heard its lyrics.
It's about the bittersweet experience of the body aging ahead of the spirit. We romanticize aging in songs and poetry. But as humans, we so often curse the number of candles on our cake and bemoan the grey in our hair. Buffett's chorus nails exactly where I stand on this aging thing:
"I'm growing older but not up
My metabolic rate is pleasantly stuck
So let the winds of change blow over my head
I'd rather die while I'm living than live while I'm dead"
So what if I'll have 39 candles this year? That just means there's more light for the celebration! Except that I don't eat cake anymore, so let's hope those candles are on a plate of nachos. Of course I am well aware of my shoulder pain and brain farts and knees that refuse to let me do jump lunges anymore. But none of that deters my spirit. I'd rather live it up, even if my version of that includes jumping into a hotel's outdoor pool in December. And jump lunges never brought me joy anyway.
I'm not letting creaking joints hold me back from making this a hella great birthday. Because this year, I have come up with a list of 40 things that I want to do by the time I turn 40. There are lots of limiting factors, like corona virus restrictions and the fact that I'm a single mom on a teacher's budget. So no spontaneous trips to Europe...yet. Starting today, I am giving myself the year to complete the list below in no particular order and then turn it into a monthly writing project to document the fun.
Some folks will read this list and think it's not that thrilling or that I should go bigger. But this list isn't for them. It's all for me. And those of you who truly know me will understand the reason behind many of these items. They range in topic from travel to giving back to celebrating my aging body. Then there are the things I'll do outside my comfort zone, those that will make memories with my daughter, and those that bring me closer to people in my life. And when constraints prove that an item cannot be checked off (because the realist in me knows that could happen), then I'll come up with some sort of alternative.
So here goes. My "40 Before 40" list:
donate to Project Safe, a local shelter for abused women
donate blood
visit a new state
visit a new National Park
take my daughter on a road trip
start a book
get a bigger tattoo
have a former student teach me something
swab for the 23 and Me DNA test
get ordained
do the polar plunge, Georgia style
create a signature cocktail
attend or host a proper tea party
wear lipstick in public
go ziplining
attend a Pride event
dye the ends of my hair a fun color (I'm thinking purple)
have my palm read or go to a tarot reading
renew my passport
visit my old kickboxing gym for a workout
get an uncommon type of spa treatment done
create a piece of art
try a pole dance workout
try a trapeze class
visit one of the Hindu temples in Georgia
teach a virtual yoga class
share a beer with a former teacher
share a beer with a former student (because I have students that old now!)
go ice skating
attend a writing class/workshop
go kayaking (bonus points if it's in a spring-fed river)
make a time capsule with my daughter
learn how to make pasta from scratch
go to a movie alone
do a TikTok dance challenge
sing a rap song at karaoke night
have boudoir photos taken (but guys...this one might be the first one swapped out because it is suuuuuuper expensive...)
run a trail 5K race
buy this candle
GO TO DISNEY!
Sending you all love! Here's to 39 rotations around the sun!
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